Coulterism or Simkinism?


Some of the aphorisms listed below were taken from Ann Coulter's books. The other were invented by Mikhail Simkin, the author of this quiz. Can you tell which is which?

After reading each quote choose the author. Hit the Submit button when done. The quiz will be graded and you will see the correct answers.


Anyone could complete the space flight in place of John Glenn. One did not have to be even human. His forerunner was, in fact, an ape. I don't know if he ever appeared at a public event, accompanied by that ape, but if he did, this was recently re-enacted by his appearance with Al Franken.

1. Coulter Simkin


Liberals are like cats; they have a pre-programmed set of strictly limited behaviors. They all have the same twitches, the same tropes, the same paranoias.

2. Coulter Simkin


The argument that "liberal" conveys no meaningful information is always stated in terms of the great variation among liberals. There is more variation among dogs than among liberals, but that doesn't mean the word "dog" has no meaning. No one demands a twenty-minute exegesis on the differences between a poodle and a Great Dane before acknowledging that the word "dog" has meaning. Similarly, there are tall liberals, short liberals, cowardly liberals, even more cowardly liberals - but there is still an essential dogness to all of them.

3. Coulter Simkin


If Democrats want to talk about middle-class tax cuts, couldn't they nominate someone who hasn't been a poodle to rich women for the past 33 years?

4. Coulter Simkin


The rape case against Kobe Bryant was withdrawn after it was found that the physical injuries, the alleged victim had suffered, could have been sustained during consensual sex. John Kerry received a Purple Heart for something what looked like a fingernail scratch on his buttock. An injury like that could have been sustained during consensual sex. As there is no proof that Kerry was raped, his Purple Heart is undeserved.

5. Coulter Simkin


Perhaps, similar to sexual orientation, cowardice is not a matter of choice?

6. Coulter Simkin


Like the Democrats, Playboy just wants to liberate women to behave like pigs, have sex without consequences, prance about naked, and abort children.

7. Coulter Simkin


Like Catholic schoolgirls engaging in wild promiscuity to prove they aren't fanatics about their religion, Robertson consistently takes the most pathetically moderate, establishment positions within the Republican Party.

8. Coulter Simkin


For years liberal media portrayed Senator McCarthy as a demagogue and compared his followers to gullible rustics, who believed in strange forest presences. Meanwhile there was a Communist conspiracy in the USA and the evidence is not spectral. Out of 159 people on McCarthy's lists at least nine were Communist spies. About hundred and sixty people were charged with witchcraft during Salem trial. What would you say if about nine of them were real witches?

9. Coulter Simkin


French Cardinal Jean-Marie Lustiger remarked on Mel Gibson's film that "Love of God is not measured in liters of hemoglobin". Redemption blood of the Savior is "hemoglobin" for this cleric.

10. Coulter Simkin